Wednesday, November 23, 2011

How About a Little Name That Tune?

While you're waiting for my next exciting writer-related blogpost, how about playing a little Name That Tune? Here are the lyrics, you just need to name the song and performer. These songs range from the 1960's to the 2000's. Two of them have two answers (the original and cover versions). Name them both for extra points! And no using Google. That's too easy!

1. They told me, when I was younger, they said, Boy, you’re gonna be president
2. Luck and intuition play the cards with Spades to start
3. And you can act real rude and totally removed and I can act like an imbecile
4. It’s not the perfume that you wear, it’s not the ribbons in your hair
5. No one I think is in my tree, I mean it must be high or low
6. Some silicone sister with her manager’s mister told me I got what it takes
7. When the kids had killed the man, I had to break up the band
8. This is for the ones who stood their ground
9. What if all these fantasies come flailing around
10. It’s obvious you hate me, though I’ve done nothing wrong
11. I’m gonna exorcise the demons of my past
12. You float like a feather in a beautiful world
13. All my friends are skeletons, they beat the rhythm with their bones
14. Well, my heart knows me better than I know myself
15. Well, it’s late and I want love, love that’s gonna break me in two
16. No changes are permanent, but change is
17. Bye, bye, it’s been a sweet love
18. Sick at heart and lonely, deep in dark despair
19. I played a divorcee in New York City
20. I felt so good, like anything was possible

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Benefit Fundraiser Poetry Reading

Wednesday night, August 3rd, at La Vie En Rose Bakery & Cafe, I'll be taking part in a poetry benefit to raise money for Laura Adams who's been diagnosed with AML, a rare form of Leukemia.

To help the Adams' family with the sudden and unexpected medical costs they are facing, her neighbors and friends have organized this exciting fundraising event.

Bring your own wine and enjoy complimentary cheese and crackers as an accompaniment. Coffees, teas and delectable desserts will be available for purchase, with 50% of all sales donated
directly to the Adams family!

The cafe is located at 10 Prospect St. in Waldwick, NJ and their phone number is: 201-652-8880.

IAMS & Animal Cruelty

IAMS is still experimenting on animals to test their products. Really? Please feel free to repost this link wherever you are.

Gary . . .

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Help Me ... I Can't Break Out This Prison All Alone

Here’s how it went.

Too many restless nights left me less than refreshed in the morning. In actuality, I was tired all the time.

Sleep study one determines I have severe sleep apnea, having 180 events over six hours. That’s 30+ times an hour I stop breathing. Bad.

Sleep study two determines that my sleep apnea is so severe, they can’t set the pressure on the CPAP properly because just when they nearly have it, I wake up, unable to exhale. Bad.

I get an APAP, which automatically adjusts the air pressure to my breathing. The problem: We all sleep in cycles. Light, medium, deep. The deeper I slept, the worse my apnea became. The APAP cycled up to compensate. But when I cycled back to my light sleep, the machine was still at maximum pressure and I woke up every two hours. Adjusting the machine left me waking up every hour. I came to realize I actually felt worse in the morning with the machine than without it. Still bad.

Now you’re up to date on the events.

Sleep deprivation does funky things to a person. A few choice experiences: lack of focus, shut down imagination, difficulty concentrating, forgetfulness, exhaustion, nodding off at inopportune times (work, driving), loss of hope of finding a solution, frustration, loss of interest in things that once made me happy, angry more often than I have the right to be.

You know, I wanted to tell you how I feel, dig into my heart and bleed my emotions across the e-screen without sounding whiny or self-pitying, but the truth is all the anger, frustration, self-hate, pessimism, hopelessness and helplessness I was coming to conquer has returned in full force. Debbie Ford calls this side of ourselves, the dark, shadow side of our souls, the Black Wolf. The Black Wolf has no faith and has forsaken God, making itself Lord and Master and I feel small and helpless under its baleful gaze.

Days and nights I remember who I used to be before the exhaustion tore my soul to shreds, leaving me apathetic to life. Yes, I’ve fallen quite far into the pit, a familiar way of living, as it seems to’ve been what I grew up surrounded by. Maybe I’m mistaken and my view back there is tainted by what I think happened. I don’t know.

All I know is, the Unholy Ghost* comes with his Black Dog** and keeps me company day and night and I’m in spiritual pain most of the time. I know there are doors and windows out of this glass prison***, but it seems such a gargantuan effort that I don’t have the energy for. At least for right now.

Gary . . .

*Unholy Ghost, taken from Unholy Ghost: Writers on Depression, edited by Nell Casey
**Black Dog. William Styron’s name for depression
***Glass Prison is a song that’s part of an epic storyline by Dream Theater that spans a number of the discs, relating to addiction and recovery. Here’s a link to the lyrics: