Sunday, August 15, 2010

I'm moving through some changes...

I thought I'd take a moment to tell you how my Five-Month Reinvention Program is going. For those who don't know what this is, I decided back on August 1st that I wanted to change myself to be happier and healthier. In order to do this, I identified five areas of my life that needed changing and they are:
Physical: Lose at least 10 pounds
Mental: Quiet the monkey mind and the negative thoughts that have ruled my life
Emotional: By silencing the Ego and it's negativity, I strive to be a happier person
Spiritual: I want a closer connection to the Divinity that some choose to call God
Environmental: I will stop taking on the emotional energy of the people around me. It's very easy for me to sync my emotional state with the people around me, so if they're down or negative, I become that way.

So how am I doing, 15 days into the program? Forgetting about the weight loss for a moment, I'm doing really well. The most important thing I'm doing for now is just being aware of the thoughts that come up and where they're coming from. When I find myself getting angry, I ask where the anger is coming from, what event/memory it's attached to. The truth is, 99% of the time, it's attached to Ego and has no basis in my reality. When I find myself getting negative about writing or something else that's important to me, I ask where this comes from and almost always, it's the false beliefs I have held as truth.

Following the feelings back to the original thought helps me to see where an emotion comes from and that in truth, I can realign my thinking or let go of those old thoughts that don't serve me any longer. I can let go of drama I've clung to and stop passing judgment on myself.

I can only live in the now; there is no past, but a collection of memories with emotions attached. It is interesting that the emotions are attached to the thoughts/memories of the event and not the event itself. In other words, the event itself is no longer what I remember, but the thoughts that were created from that event.

I have started listening to Buddhist teachings and have found peace in what I learn. I'm taking small steps in this journey, but that serves me the best. Practicing compassion, tolerance, patience, love, and peace toward myself and those around me, understanding that they are living their stories as well, and (most, not all) are trying to wake up, has really helped me find peace in my day. I have my moments, but they are just moments and they pass.

Right now, I am content and this moment is all I can ask for.

Gary . . .

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